New York State Funeral Directors Association

Field of flowers

A lady learned of a dear friend’s passing and read in the obituary – much to her dismay – a request that no flowers be sent.

She wondered why in a post on an online chat room, saying she planned to “comply” with the family’s wishes but “can’t help thinking that it’s sad not to give someone a send off with flowers.”

I couldn’t agree more.

Shells fall to the deck as smoke from the funeral volley gun shots lingers and the sound of a 24-note bugle call begins to fill the air.

Sailors aboard the Nimitiz-class aircraft carrier USS John C. Stennis (CVN 74) stand in silence as the sounding of taps gently moves across the otherwise silent decks, commemorating those who have passed during a burial at sea, Nov. 9.

The walls feel like they’re closing in. You can’t breath, your mouth is dry, you’re dizzy, and your heart pounds.

Not to make it any less scary, but it isn’t the first time you’ve had a panic attack like this; you’ve had a lot of them since the funeral last summer.

In the new book “Anxiety: The Missing Stage of Grief” by Claire Bidwell Smith, LCPC, you’ll see how, when the walls close in, you can open a door.

Video: Slaves No More

New York's Capital Region honors, re-buries Colonial-era slaves. Found by accident in an unmarked cemetery, scientists pinpointed their African origin and the community held a wake and funeral.

Video: Family History

Today, resources are becoming more widely available, giving people the ability to learn exciting stories about their ancestors. Find 14 great tips on the Blog.


SympathyNotes is written to stimulate discussion of death and grief. Opinions do not reflect the views of NYSFDA.

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